Mom & Me Two Archive

...this time my mother's request. I had to make a Costco supply run. I did it very early, arriving back at 1045, at which time I slipped into my mother's bedroom. She was sprawled and sleeping hard. I awoke her, knowing that I had a lot to do today as we're having company tomorrow. Yes, I know, I said no visitors but these are the people who grab me by the scruff of the neck and pull me out of my doldrums, the people who keep as close and practiced an eye on my mother as I do, the people who tell me to grab a nap while they're here, they'll keep an eye on "Mom". When MCF heard my phone message she insisted on a visit and something in her voice told me it would be a good idea if I didn't refuse her and those of her family (also friends) who could make it.
    Mom begged to be allowed to sleep in until noon. I okayed this, knowing that I could probably get a good start on the necessary cleaning during that hour and 15 minutes. But wait! There's more. The first thing I did was call MCF to let her know rain is setting in and the worst of it is expected tomorrow, with a flash flood watch which will affect her drive. She hates to drive in bad weather. As it turns out, she's sick with something, sounded like warmed over shit and begged off until next week, since we're expecting snow on the weekend and she's like Mom is about snow...been there, done that, never again.
    So, company for tomorrow's been cancelled and I'm over being under the weather, although I suppose, considering how exhilarated rain causes me to feel, one could probably say I am ecstatically under the weather. Mom is flat under the weather.
    At Costco I picked up the second part of the final season of Sex and the City and we've been rewatching that until just a bit ago when Mom decided on a nap. I expect we'll polish it off this evening, take a peak at the alternate endings and see how they compare with our druthers.
    On my way back from Costco this morning it suddenly hit me with some unpleasantness that for the last three months my mother has been homebound, due to me, not to anything inherent in her 'condition'. She hasn't, I don't think, been unhappy nor do I think anything about her has suffered but I need to get her out again for her sake. As I realized this I was also overwhelmed with the memory of how much work it is to get her out:

• how long it takes to work her up to it, which includes both mood and body preparation;
• how long any outing takes when she's along;
• how concentrated I must be on her even while I'm accomplishing the purpose of the outing;
• how every trip involves the Emergency Bag which is used about 50% of the time;
• how long it takes to 'debrief' her after outings;
• how it is that, when I bring her along in our outside life I automatically lose time alone;
• how this factor, in large part, has led to the last three months of her homeboundedness...

...and how I want to figure out a way to do all this without losing myself. One way or another, I guess, I'll figure it out because I must. It'll be interesting to see what I come up with. It will most likely consist of three parts attitude change and one part routine change. But it's time. It's definitely time.
    Later, probably.